Adventure Team daydream

G.I. Joe, no doubt as soon as you read those words it conjures images into your mind. G.I. Joe means a lot of different things for different people, mainly depending on your age. For me it means the 12 inch G.I. Joe Adventure Team action figures, the greatest line of toys ever produced in my opinion. So if your idea of G.I. Joe involves Cobra, Ninjas, or robot power armor, you may as well skip this and go into the bathroom to pleasure yourself staring at your mint condition Baroness figure or Shipwreck if that's your thing (and there's nothing wrong that).

The Adventure Team figures were probably the most macho bastards ever to stand on a toy shelf. Look at those rugged full beards and badass utilitarian coveralls, that says you are serious about adventure because you aren't worried about grooming or fashion. No super powers or secret ninja mind tricks either, the Adventure Team got by on intelligence, training, and just plain old balls. I think during the 90's they did some sort of reissue of 12 inch Joes and were trying to draw in some money with nostalgia. But it didn't work for me, the original G.I. Joe Adventure Team had a kind of ruggedness that couldn't exist beyond the 1970's.

Here's a list of reasons you could never be on the G.I. Joe Adventure Team:
You are not a Man.

You have knowingly purchased an exfoliating soap.

You can't grow a full beard.

You freeze when attacked by an enraged white tiger.

You can't change a tire.

You are incapable of stealth even when wearing a black turtleneck and toboggan.


There are lots more but I can't think of them right now. So here's a heroclix token of G.I. Joe Adventure Team Commander, you probably won't like it because he doesn't have a samurai sword or a parrot on his shoulder.